It was another long day, which turned into another long night, week, and month. There wasn’t much distinction between day and night. Either way, my son was in pain, screaming, and needing what comfort I could provide.
Have you been there? On caregiving duty day and night. All day. All night. All week. All month for months on end.
What was expected to be the newborn exhaustion phase has continued and instead of a few weeks has lasted several months or years? Sleep deprived. Your brain is foggy. Your emotions aren’t exactly stable. You’re not sure when you last showered, an uninterrupted bathroom break is a luxury, and sleep? What is that? You’re not the picture of the joyful, intentional mother you always dreamed you’d be and still crave to be.
I don’t know if that’s you, but that’s my story.
It can seem unending. And trying to squeeze in anything else, how do you do that when you’re already on full-time duty 24 hours/day? You know, those other peripheral things like the basic daily care of your husband, other kids, household tasks and reading your Bible.
You’re just dragging yourself through the day (and night) because while you’re no longer that energetic, “I’ve got this” mom, you are that loving, caregiving mom and you’re doing all you can to make sure your child survives and hopefully gets the help he needs too. Yet, you see all things and people you are neglecting in life and they stack up like a litany of failures of all that you are not doing. Cannot do.
If my story and the feelings of failure and guilt resonate with you and some part of your story and feelings, it’s time to reframe some of those thoughts! You may not be able to change your circumstances, but you can change your thoughts and perspective.
Over the next two weeks, together we will look at four of those thought patterns that we so often struggle with and how we can reframe them.
Written by Sarah McGuire